Disconnect from Hustle Culture

On Monday, I was lucky enough to be part of a panel of coaches speaking to 80 women professionals about demystifying hustle culture. In speaking to a room of ambitious people, one needs to be careful about telling them they shouldn't buy into working hard, caring about their careers, or supporting themselves and their families as best they can. Ambition in and of itself is fine, we all explained, but not when it comes at the price of self-abandonment.

Sadly, so many of the hospitality leaders I work with suffer from self-abandonment. In an effort to serve others, they put their own needs aside, thinking that working harder will mean more impact, allowing them to meet work goals, be recognized, or make them feel worthy. By the time many reach me, they are burned out, riddled with anxiety, and never feel like they are enough.

Society would have us all believe that achieving the American Dream means working until you pass out at night, giving until you bleed, and feeling guilty whenever you finally have a chance to rest. It keeps us in a cycle of constant anxiety as we feverishly try to "stay on top" of things, robbing us of presence, calm, and joy.

Such is the myth of hustle culture.

But as a hospitality leader, you're probably laughing at the notion that your work should be anything but a hustle. After all, that's what hospitality leaders do best, right? When it's go-time, it's all hands on deck. Good hospitality, you might argue, needs to involve self-abandonment if we are to provide the perfect experience, putting our egos on hold to create an offering that makes others feel the magic we are trying to create. (I can see you nodding your heads.) But there's a difference between go-time and no time. Yes, hospitality is seasonal—often feast or famine. But this doesn't mean erasing your own needs, desires, pleasures and goals from the equation. And it certainly does not mean putting your life on hold.

As the new year begins, here is your invitation to start living a little more softly with a different kind of list of goals.

• Instead of striving, what would it take to start thriving?
• Instead of working harder, how would it feel to work smarter?
• Instead of reaching for approval, how would it feel to start loving yourself unconditionally?

When we disconnect from hustle culture, we start stepping into our softness, allowing us to get clear about what matters most. We start embracing our values, we start choosing grace in lieu of perfection, and we start stepping into our joy. And none of this needs to come at the expense of our ambitions and desires. Rather, by embracing our softness, we recognize we are humans, not robots, and we start infusing our lives with more meaning and purpose.

If you're ready to put a new spin on your relationship with hustle culture, let's talk. Let 2026 be the year you meet your goals without losing yourself.